


Welcome to McRiegans!

by YouSpoonyBard1



Category: Fire Emblem: Fuukasetsugetsu | Fire Emblem: Three Houses
Genre: Dimitri Alexandre Blaiddyd Needs a Hug, McDonald's, Multi, This came from a late night meme on Joe Zieja's Discord dont judge me, no one dies
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2019-09-13
Updated: 2019-09-12
Packaged: 2020-10-17 12:00:23
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 824
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/20620673
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/YouSpoonyBard1/pseuds/YouSpoonyBard1
Summary: What if Claude was a manager of a Fast food place?This is just a series of connected one shots, all from the same Idea. A meme created in Joe Zieja's Discord server- the Claude Squad! Everyone will make an appearance and only the first chapter will have a 'serious' moment.May start slow, but the memes will be often! Hope you enjoy!





	Welcome to McRiegans!

In Fódland, the best time of the day at Garreg Mach, is lunch. This was when everyone from all houses in the Officers Academy, sat down and just relaxed. All, except one. Claude von Riegan had discovered he was approved to build a ‘fast food paradise’ as he called it. After much begging, he was able to get most of the other students from all three houses to join him and work for him. Months later, after hours of training and building, the shop was set to officially open its doors for the first time. Claude walked out of his office and saw everyone looking at him. “Don't worry guys. It’s gonna be great. Trust me, nothing ever goes wrong on opening day!” He smiled, nodded, and opened the front door with a smile.

“Welcome to McRiegans!” He yelled, as a small crowd of people walked into the shop. At the front, Sylvain, Mercedes, and Marianne stood poised and ready at the registers. As soon as Ashe and Bernadetta got the first order in the kitchen area, it was time. Although she would  _ never _ show her face in the front of the house, Bernadetta had become one of the best cooks Claude had ever seen. As orders and food came and went, Claude made sure to make his presence known to the guests. He was in the middle of saying hello to a very old monk, when there was a tap on his shoulder.

It was a younger student of the academy. “Are you the manager?!” she all but screamed at him. Before Claude was even done nodding, the girl was off again “This lady got my order ALL wrong!” She started, waving a hand briefly at Marianne. The blunette tried to just focus on the customer at her regester, but the whole store seemed to have eyes on the explosion in front of Claude. “She got EVERYTHING wrong! I Don’t understand how ANYONE can get something as simple as PUSHING BUTTONS WRONG but she did!!” The student paused to take a breath, but she was about to realize she had made a mistake.

You dont fuck with Marianne.

Before Claude could even start to speak in defence of the now crying Marianne, The student who was yelling, was now yelling in  _ fear _ . Her Hair was suddenly ablaze. As she ran out of the building, the remaining customers looked at Claude for an explanation. Claude, was looking at Marianne, who was looking at Lysithea, who was grinning, blowing the smoke off of her finger from the spell. Noticing everyone was looking at her, Lysithea just shrugged. “What? We all thought about hurting her. I only did what we all thought about!” One student in the back just clapped in agreement. "See? That guy understands me! It's not like she got hurt. She's just bald now."

With that, Claude just sighed, and handed her a mop. “Just…. Just go clean the play area. WITHOUT magic.” Though she grumbled, Lysithea went over and started to clean. Slowly, everyone went back to eating, ordering, and working. Claude gave Marianne her break, and smiled at her. As he walked to the back he saw Hilda running to the break room, practically launching herself at the upset bluenette who looked like she had just finished crying. Nodding, Claude just walked into the office without a word. Hilda could take care of her. He would check on her tomorrow.

After that, the remainder of the Opening day went on without any issues. Other than Ignatz complaining about the 'ugly wall art' in the sitting area. As the last customer left, Claude grinned and gave everyone the night off. He could clean the store, they deserved the chance to breathe. He went and locked up the play area, making a mental note to have Lysithea clean it regularly. It looked like no one had used it all day. After about another hour or so, he locked up, turned the lights off, and went to the dorms. He was excited for the future of the store.

* * *

At two in the morning Byleth was awoken to her phone. ‘ _ Wait… only the other teachers have my number…’ _ she thought as she groggily stood up and walked to her desk. ‘ _ I swear to Sothis if this is Manuela drunk again…’  _ “H..Hello?”

It was  _ not  _ Manuela. “Ah. Yes. Hello Professor. I Have something to ask of you ...” Began Seteth. When he was finished, Byleth hung up. She  _ must _ still be asleep, she thought to herself ‘ _ Even in my dreams, I know better. Setheth wouldn't be caught dead in the play area anywhere…”  _ as sleep took her once more.

"Flayn, I doubt anyone will come for us... go use the ball pit as a bed. I will continue to try and reach out for help- OW! Flayn, Stop throwing the balls at me! I am-ow! trying to save us!"

Seteth would not be saved that night.

**Author's Note:**

> Hope you enjoyed! Special thanks to the members of the Claude Squad Discord for this crazy idea. 
> 
> See you in the next update!


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